cw: 135.8

I worked out for 5 hours today. Needless to say I am EXHAUSTED.

bf: tea, piece of banana
l: 2 boca burgers, (140 cal together)
2 pieces of chocolate

Yesterday was alright but I ate a bit of not healthy food cause I'm stupid!

Cw: 134.4!
I guess GW1 is done?! Wow. Lol
Still working hard.
Xxx Anna

cw: 137.2

I'm 1.2 lbs away from GW1!
On top of my game today. So far:
banana
Watermelon
apple and 1tsp PB

Cw: 137.8

It's going down! I've been at the gym for 2 hours yesterday and today nonstop working out.
Yesterday I also ate steamed vegetables and watermelon.
Today:
Tea and honey
Cantaloupe and watermelon
Steamed broccoli

cw: 139.8, ~5 lbs away from gw1!
I guess its something? some progress? I've already gotten sick with a sore throat and a fever and muscle aches, wow, on my 4th day in? Ive walked about a mile today, eaten nothing but an apple and peanut butter, and the scale and the weight WILL NOT CHANGE! Its so aggravating. Off to work out some more, i'm already sick of it.

I have never felt this fat nor weighed this much before in my entire life. I loil absolutely disgusting in EVERYTHING I WEAR. I don't want to leave my house because I feel so gross. I look gross. People will laugh at me and my failures at being thin. And no one will ever admit to your face that you're not as thin as you think you are. But ive realized it. And today marks the ULTIMATE start of this fast. I have to lose as my weight as possible in 24 days when I leave to travel. aahhhhhhhh

No eating no eating no eating.

Okay weigh in is tomorrow! I forgot to weigh myself before i drank like a gallon of water this morning. But today I've only had watermelon... so is that considered food? Because it feels like it should, but its just water techinically. Or 'juice' or whatever it is!
:)

2nd Day

Today I had:
fruit (idk how many calories!)
Dried fruit snack 45 cal
cheetos... :-(

Going to exercise for couple hours. Walking, running, lunges, crunches etc.
My MAIN goal into get down to GW1. 135lbs. Weigh in tomorrow morning :) hoping to see a difference, especially after I go burn some off now.

Today I had a lot of watermelon.
watermelon
tea
cheetos :/ I know, stupid me.
5 shrimp

The body I need

CW: 140.0

I ate a bagel and coffee today. I have a special dinner tonight though, hope I don't pig out and stuff my face with food. Water water water water water.


I wish I looked like this.... wow. I have a lot of work to do. A looot.

I kinda felt the panic I'll have to feel after tomorrow when I start fasting. So it freaked me out, like "how can i not eat?" and "what am i doing to myself?" But I feel fatter and fatter every damn day. So there wont be a choice to not eat, I just wont. And I'll drink water when my stomach hurts and exercise and blog or llok at thinspo when I'm dying to eat something. Or to go on a binge, but I won't let that happen. 1 more day.

I had like 4 pieces of pizza today. Can you believe that?! WOW WHATAFATASS. WOW.

Ugh I've never felt so fat before. And I've never weighed this much before in my life. I've been a 120 for forget and then BOOM. I came back last summer weighing 119. THAT was amazing because I started at 135. But this year I need results. And I only have about3 weeks to fully fast. Then I'm around family too much to fast but I'll still not eat when I can. And that's for a month. So hopefully 40 lbs will be gone.
Of course I'm worried about damaging my bones and muscles but hey, you gotta do what you gotta do. I'll take vitamins. And exercise so much.
But it starts in 3 days after exams cause I can't fast on exams!
Best of luck to all other starters out there, we can do this!

bonjourrr

i'm starting this blog to journal my days to becoming thin. Its inspiration, motivation, and such a strong help to me to get what i need. Starting May 19th, I am losing 30- 40 lbs to get down to 100 lbs. I might stop at 110 depending on my health. I wont be eating, obviously, but it'll be secretive to conceal it from others. Either way, it'll be so so sooo worth it to finally be thin again. I'm like 140 something! I cant believe it, and ill actually have to weigh myself before I start, but I'm too scared. Either way, here it goes!
xxx Anna